Well here we are again, its been a funny couple of days, for some reason I have been feeling a little low compared with how I had been on friday, still can't work out why but saying that, I keep telling everyone that I intend to be back at work at the end of this sick note and I have noticed that everytime I say this I start panicking a bit, so, I am not going to think about it again, I will just get on with it, at the end of the day there is only me that can get me better.
On a positive note, I went shopping yesterday. Due to being low it was a bit scary as I was shaking just at the thought but I went for it. I managed to go to both Sainsbury's and Aldi. At Aldi I overshopped and being on my pushbike panicked, made a few phone calls to try and get a bit of help but everyone was busy, aaarrrgh proper panic!!! At one point I nearly walked away and left my shopping where it was!!! Anyway to cut a long story short, I took a few deep breaths and thought it through logically. In the past I have thought nothing of riding my bike with numerous bags on the handles and a basket overflowing, Ian always stares in amazement at how I can get home with it all. Now if I could do this in the past I can do it now, the pep talk worked, ok so I didnt actually ride my bike but I made it home with four large carriers, an overflowing basket and a tray with forty seedling pots in, wow!!!!
I even managed to cook a meal of pork chops, mash, carrots and asparagus, something else I havent really done for a while so although I may be feeling a bit lower, I am actually working through it, even cleaning is getting easier as I have even been able to do that better than I have been doing recently too.
I have a friend that contacted me last year that I used to go to school with, she is going through similar to me at the moment and we email each other almost every day, sometimes more. I really look forward to hearing from her as its so nice to have someone that really understands you.
Its strange really as we seem to go in and out of each others lives at a time when we are most needed. I'm not sure if I believe in karma and someone watching over you but if thats true then we must have the same person as we keep getting pushed back together. I wonder how long we will keep in touch this time but I know that when we do lose contact we will both be strong enough to cope on our own, in the mean time we will be there for each other.
On a positive note, I went shopping yesterday. Due to being low it was a bit scary as I was shaking just at the thought but I went for it. I managed to go to both Sainsbury's and Aldi. At Aldi I overshopped and being on my pushbike panicked, made a few phone calls to try and get a bit of help but everyone was busy, aaarrrgh proper panic!!! At one point I nearly walked away and left my shopping where it was!!! Anyway to cut a long story short, I took a few deep breaths and thought it through logically. In the past I have thought nothing of riding my bike with numerous bags on the handles and a basket overflowing, Ian always stares in amazement at how I can get home with it all. Now if I could do this in the past I can do it now, the pep talk worked, ok so I didnt actually ride my bike but I made it home with four large carriers, an overflowing basket and a tray with forty seedling pots in, wow!!!!
I even managed to cook a meal of pork chops, mash, carrots and asparagus, something else I havent really done for a while so although I may be feeling a bit lower, I am actually working through it, even cleaning is getting easier as I have even been able to do that better than I have been doing recently too.
I have a friend that contacted me last year that I used to go to school with, she is going through similar to me at the moment and we email each other almost every day, sometimes more. I really look forward to hearing from her as its so nice to have someone that really understands you.
Its strange really as we seem to go in and out of each others lives at a time when we are most needed. I'm not sure if I believe in karma and someone watching over you but if thats true then we must have the same person as we keep getting pushed back together. I wonder how long we will keep in touch this time but I know that when we do lose contact we will both be strong enough to cope on our own, in the mean time we will be there for each other.